He was born in Chatham, in Kent, to a family of seventeen Bowie look-alikes and was coincidentally their fifteenth son named David. At the age of 12, Zowie bought a wooden leg and a spliff using the £17 that his family had left, and left home to write music. It was only until 2 years later that he realized the music was complete arse, so he returned to his family, only to find that they had joined the fascist movement. Zowie was not seen for five years, until he was found on the coast of Dungeness, three dead Bowie look-alikes surrounding his unconscious body.