CIA sources have determined that Al Quaeda intends to destroy marriage through the use of terror tactics. Some of their intended plots: * Firebombing bridal showers * Flying a plane into the headquarters of Modern Bride magazine * Developing a virus to destroy rice and confetti * Assassinating key photographers, caterers, DJs and ice sculptors The amendment would enact the following provisions to defend marriage: 1. Require all Americans over the age of 13 to be married to not more than one person of the opposite sex by 6 months after the amendment's ratification. ]