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  • A Shot in the Dark/Quotes
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  • :[Joe is taking small talk class] :Joe: It sure is cloudy today. :Joe's teacher: Good, you could have also responded to Janet, who said her son died. :Joe: I'm sorry your son died on such a cloudy day. ---- :[Peter shoots a shadowy figure, which is then revealed to be Cleveland Jr.] :Peter: Cleveland Jr.? :Cleveland Jr. Mr. Griffin! You shot me! :Peter: Oh my God! :Lois Peter, where are you? Peter? Okay, I'm starting The Good Wife without you. :Peter: Phew, heh. Unlike you,I dodged a bullet. ---- :[Dr. Hartman comes into the room with Cleveland Jr. and his parents] :Dr. Hartman: Okay, next is the Brown family... :[He notices that they heard him] :Dr. Hartman: Oh! Oh, I'm so sorry. Sometimes, I write descriptions of my patients to help me remember them. :Cleveland: No, it's okay. Our last name is Brown. :Dr. Hartman: Ah, okay. Phew. Oh, so this must be Chubster Dumb Dumb. ---- :Donna: You wouldn't have fired that gun if he was white! :Peter: That's not true, I'll shoot anybody. Joe, give me your gun. :Joe: Here you go...hey wait a second! ---- :Brian: I don't think it's lost on any of us that the laws are written on white paper. :Stewie: Yeah, white paper. Check your jacket pocket. :[Brian finds a note in his pocket and reads it] :Brian: "I don't think it's lost on any of us that the laws are written on white paper." Hey, look. I'm just saying. It's no surprise that justice isn't color blind. :Stewie: Check your other jacket pocket. :[Brian reads the other note] :Brian: "Hey, look I'm just saying. It's no surprise that justice isn't color blind." Stewie, you're a jerk! :Stewie: Check Chris' pocket. :[Brian sticks his hand in his pocket] :Brian: What? There's nothing in here and...Oh, God! The bottom of the pocket's been cut out! :Chris: Thanks, Brian. I was the mastermind behind this whole thing. ---- :Brian: Boy, the world we live in, huh? :Chris: Brian, reach into Meg's pocket. :Meg: Go ahead, Brian. :Brian: I...I don't wanna. ---- :Peter: Hey, how ya feeling there, champ? :Cleveland Jr.: I'm good. Getting better every day. :Peter: Oh, I'm happy to hear that. Look, I hope you know. I'm sorry. :Cleveland Jr.: Hey, these things happen. :Cleveland: That's my boy. :[Cleveland walks away] :Cleveland Jr.: Mr. Griffin? :Peter: Yeah? :Cleveland Jr.: Just so you know, I'm gunna be coming for yo ass. :Peter: What's that now? :Cleveland Jr. I'm saying it's on. You ever feel the cool steel of a switchblade, pressed against your temple? [Laughter] Hey, Mr. Griffin, I'm just kidding...or am I? You're gunna be wondering about that, ya fat bitch. See you later!
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  • A Shot in the Dark
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