About: Hairy ball theorem   Sponge Permalink

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That topologists use such gassy English is an indication why they are not able to comb a hairy ball, either. They refer to the missing spot as a tuft, a cowlick, or The Latest Rage. The latter is a way of claiming they missed the spot on purpose. Yeah, sure.

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rdfs:label
  • Hairy ball theorem
rdfs:comment
  • That topologists use such gassy English is an indication why they are not able to comb a hairy ball, either. They refer to the missing spot as a tuft, a cowlick, or The Latest Rage. The latter is a way of claiming they missed the spot on purpose. Yeah, sure.
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dbkwik:uncyclopedi...iPageUsesTemplate
Revision
  • 5600645(xsd:integer)
Date
  • 2012-11-07(xsd:date)
abstract
  • That topologists use such gassy English is an indication why they are not able to comb a hairy ball, either. They refer to the missing spot as a tuft, a cowlick, or The Latest Rage. The latter is a way of claiming they missed the spot on purpose. Yeah, sure. Some topologists are embarrassed that so many in the trade are so physically inept, and shave their balls instead. However, they also tend to cut themselves shaving, a fact that explains why the profession is in decline and new topologists have to be converted from other disciplines, after attending months of courses on Topologist Character Development and getting the priest's blessing. The corollary that "one cannot comb the hair on my balls in a smooth manner" [1] is analogous to the String Theory (regarding stringing my balls together). It completely explains the universe, at least as it relates to hairy balls, by comparing it to a bowl, and hairy balls to celestial bodies. Gravity shakes the balls, causing the stress that sustains all life, at least in graduate school. Without this motion, celestial bodies could be starved of oxygen and become blue balls.
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