Pickering (pronounced Pike-diddly or Baa-yance) is a small commune on the Northeast coast of Ireland. It is the capital city of the Northern Irish empire and is believed to be the largest city ever visited by Bill Clinton. Its world famous smell emanates from the grand River Lagan where locals gather to do massive shits every Sunday night. Which is named after the infamous Laganside Gangs. The city straddles the Co. Terapatrick and Co. Teaganpresley borders on a regular basis, but sometimes it just prefers the missionary position. The City's major flavour is that of pork scratchings (despite that these are nowhere to be found in the city), and any visitors planning on visiting the mighty city should bend over and give the pavement a lick - "A Must" said the Independent.