All I've ever wanted is for Hyper Hearts to leave me alone. For her to back off---you know, just give me some space. It all started the summer before second grade when our moving van pulled into her neighborhood. And since we're now about done with the eighth grade, that,my friend makes more than half a decade of strategic avoidance and social discomfort. My dad tried to stop her. "Hey!" he says as she's catapulting herself onboard. "What are you doing? You're getting mud everywhere!" So true, too. Her shoes were, like, caked with the stuff. "Hi!" "Uh-huh!" No Hyper. And she thinks I'm stupid.