December 21, 2006 Donald Rumsfeld proposes using textbooks as shields in Iraq NUTLEY, New Jersey -- At a press conference today, Donald Rumsfeld, reacting to the unpopularity of the deaths of over 2,500 Americans due to neocon lies and world conquest ambitions, announced a new program to try to reduce the number of future unneeded deaths as a result of the evil of the Republican vampiric cabal that is currently running America and attempting (although spectacularly unsuccessfully so far) to run the world: used textbooks to "deflect the terrorist death thingies, like bullets and stuff."