The lead singer, Bono, really can walk on water. This miracle started to happen after he stole Sting's halo, when the latter decided tantric sex was far more interesting than saving the planet. He also has no eyeballs, which is why he always wears sunglasses. We are not sure why The Edge never takes his beannie off. Maybe hes bald. I would pay to see his bald head, but not in a perverted way.