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The unnamed Chef presided over the chaotic kitchens at Tatlock Towers on their medieval themed weekend in November 2010. First seen spraying the contents of a fire extinguisher onto a frazzled Turkey, he explained to frantic manager Reg Holdsworth that the bird had been intended as a substitute for the promised Roasted Swan and that the canopies would no longer be Larks’ Tongues in Aspic as they couldn’t get enough tongues. Things reached crisis point though when the boar for the spit roast proved to be deep frozen and couldn’t be cooked in time. Recently arrived company director Curly Watts ordered that every hairdryer in the castle be turned on the icy block and, with the help of cuts warmed up in a microwave, the dissatisfied guests were finally fed.

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